Third world welcome

Garry and I have arrived in Panama. Our BA flight departed Heathrow shortly after 9.30am, reaching Miami nine hours later. The contrast between Miami airport and the efficient, shiny new Terminal Five couldn’t have been starker. Security took five minutes to complete at Heathrow. In Miami we queued for half an hour in a tiny immigration lounge for a regular entry visa.

International transit doesn’t exist in the USA. Its Government actively discourages such passengers, considering them a threat to national security. As a result, every arriving passenger is forced to enter the nation before catching their transfer flight. However, the US Government has decidedly odd rules regarding transit luggage.

At Heathrow we were told we’d have to collect our bags in Miami and transfer them ourselves. We waited in the baggage hall for 20 minutes. Not one bag appeared. We approached an American Airlines representative and were advised that the airline automatically transfers luggage destined for Central America. We later discovered that automatic transfer was only available to foreign airlines transferring bags to American-owned airlines. Passengers transferring from one American airline to another always have to collect their bags. Surprisingly, this restriction was introduced after 9/11. I wonder why are foreign airlines considered safer than American ones?

Our arrival in Panama took bureaucratic contradiction to the next level. Shortly after landing the pilot announced that our terminal gate was occupied. He went on to explain that we’d been instructed to sit for an hour on the tarmac until a gate became available. We eventually disembarked, only to be confronted with arrows to immigration and baggage collection pointed in opposite directions.

We took a stab at the right hand corridor and soon found ourselves standing at animmigration counter. It was here we learnt a few lessons in third-world border security. Garry entered the country within minutes despite the fact that his immigration officer had never heard of the United Kingdom. His paperwork was processed without hesitation. Meanwhile, I handed over the same paperwork and was told I didn’t have the appropriateTourist Card issued by my airline. No such card was mentioned during our flight and no Airline representative greeted us on arrival.

Without warning the Immigration Officer took my passport and pointed me in the direction of the baggage hall. He instructed me to get a Tourist Card from the nearest airline official and come back to him. I couldn’t believe it. I was being invited to enter the country without a passport. For the next twenty minutes was sent from one airline representative to another, each vaguely pointing to opposite ends of the baggage hall in a vain search for a Tourist Card. I was even directed back through another rwo of passport control counters back into the terminal.

Defeated, I returned to the immigration officer I had first encountered. He took pity on me and without a word of explanation walked me through the airport to a tiny temporary podium on the opposite side of the building. Here a young man was handing out American Airline’s Tourist Cards for US$5 each. I was now free to enter Panama.

Perhaps the most priceless moment throughout the entire experience was being escorted past Garry by two immigration officials. Given that I was confused as he was I simply shrugged my shoulders and disappeared into the distance. I'm sure he thought I'd been arrested.

Our next adventure involved our luggage. The baggage hall had six carousels. None had flights listed on their accompanying screens despite rows of bags circulating underneath. After several stampedes around the hall our flight was finally united with it bags. The fun continued as we exited the customs hall. We were now almost three hours behind schedule. It soon became apparent that our tour representative was nowhere to be found. Several weary calls to the tour company ensued before being instructed to catch a cab to our hotel on the promise that all expenses would be reimbursed.

Almost 21 hours after we’d left home we finally found ourselves in a hotel in Panama. It was amusing to reflect on our experience passing through three airports. Two felt distinctly third world, one did not. Luggage transiting through the USA can be transferred automatically while people cannot. Two passengers, travelling on Australian passports, can gain access to the same country via completely different means for no apparent reason. American Airlines is unable to correctly instruct non-American customers on basic travel needs. If simply getting to Panama was any guide, the rest of our holiday was set to be one huge adventure.